Sexual Intimacy and Family

Spouses sometimes turn to opposite gender friends to discuss their marriage problems. This is not good idea because they can development strong feelings and emotions toward them. Spouses commit infidelity because they are not satisfied in their own marriage. Spouses who engage in sex outside of marriage are not only risking themselves to get expose to STD s but their spouse as well.

To prevent marital infidelity it’s important to set marriage boundaries. Both spouses need to discuss marital problems with each other and work them out at their home. They should hold firm to their marital vows. They should be on guard at all times and be loyal to each other. They should always put each other first before anyone else besides the Lord.

When parents have children that become teenagers, they should be involved their teenager’s life. It is important that the parents teach their children when they are learning about sex education. The parents should answer the children’s questions when they don’t know about sex. The parents can do this by explaining the how’s and why’s to help prevent them from committing sexual intimacy before they are married.  

No spouses should ever commit infidelity. If they are having problems in their marriage they should work them out with each other. This can form a stronger bond in the relationship. They can also pray to the Lord for guidance. Parents should teach their teenagers about early romantic relationships. If the children see how their parents are solving problems in the marriage, the children can learn from them and be prepared for when they get married. 

Early Marriage Adjustments

Newlyweds adjusting to live with each other in the first year of marriage may run into some difficulties. Both husband and wife may do things different in the household. They both learned different things as they were raised by their parents. For example, looking through the husband’s private mail without his consent or the husband doing the wife’s laundry. It’s important for the married couple to discuss the boundaries so they are on the same page. They shouldn’t share certain things about their spouses to their friends, like how they fight together when raising their first child. This violates each other personal matters and affairs. The couple should compromise and settle their differences so there is no conflict. The husband and wife should divide chores between each other. This way the wife or husband won’t feel like she is doing all the work. The married couple should not tell friends and family about their fights. It’s between them to resolve the issue.

Parents of the newlyweds should have no stewardship over their children when they are adults. The parents don’t need to get involved in their children’s relationship with their spouse. If the child needs help they can ask for advice, but there should be no involvement or getting in between the problems the children have without being asked. This can lead to mistrust in the newlyweds relationship.  

Marriage Preparation

Advice for Marriage Preparation

After reading excerpts from the book How to Avoid Marrying a Jerk, I will give you advice on preparing for marriage.

There are many factors to consider while preparing for marriage. For those who are searching for someone to marry, be careful who you choose. You don’t want to be married to someone who is a jerk of a husband or wife. He or she will not treat you equally. Don’t just let the outward appearance deceive you. You need to know how he or she treats someone. Make sure they meet your personal needs, but also contribute to the relationship. Don’t ever change your personality to match with theirs. Just be who you are.

Getting To Know Each Other

Don’t be in a rush to get to know someone. It takes time. Date someone who is friendly to you and treats others with respect. See how your partner acts and treats you in various situations. Develop a deeper openness and have a variety of experiences with them. It’s always best to date in person rather than online because you won’t actually see their emotions and don’t know what they will do if one day when you’re with them. They could be cat-fishing you and pretending to be someone else. You should make sure to go on a secure dating website because there are crazy people out there who steal other people’s identity. After around a three month period is when you should go into depth when sharing things about yourself. Of course you need to be able to trust them.

Consider some of these questions when you are dating someone: Do they have similar interests? Are their energy levels comparable? Do they build good memories with you? How do they handle frustrations, stresses, and obstacles?

Anger and Frustration

Emotions can come out explosively while becoming critical and insulting to you. It’s wrong for a partner to express ownership over you. Just because you have some strong connection or attachment with them or you feel safe with them won’t make up for other negative things about them. If they threaten to leave you or end the relationship it’s probably a sign. You need to be with someone who treats you better and nicer. In the book How to Avoid Marrying a Jerk the author says “Good-hearted people have the greatest risk for staying in a relationship with a jerk.” Those of you who are struggling with these kinds of relationships should watch out for repeated cycles of verbal, mental, and physical abuse. It’s okay for you to forgive them, but if they continuously take advantage of these situations, something needs to change.    

In Conclusion

In preparing for marriage, search for a companion who treats you well. Be in a healthy relationship. When getting to know them, make sure your personalities are compatible, make sure you go to a secure dating website, and be aware of explosive personalities. Don’t rush to get married. Take your time. It’s worth it in the end to find the right person for you. 

Gender Roles

There are natural roles that come with each gender role. During the 1800s, a man had to provide for his family while a woman stayed home and took care of the household chores and the children. World War II changed the roles. Women had to go to work while their husbands fought in the War, which led women to become more independent and to work in other professions. Today, women in America have the right to work in the same professions as men do. They can provide for a family or choose to be a stay home mother. Men can work from home and be a stay home father if they choose. Just because there are traditional gender roles doesn’t mean every family has to live that way. Each family needs to respect other family dynamics and choices even if they are different from theirs. Gender roles are passed on from generation to generation. If a mother works outside the home, their daughters may be more likely to work as well.

Some family situations involve a mother taking over the providing role due to the father having a tragic accident or disability where they can’t work anymore.

In the Mormon Church, we believe that the Father provides, protects and presides over the family. The Mothers are the primary caretakers. Sometimes in the church families judge other families if they don’t meet the traditional family standards. It’s not their place to judge because no one is perfect. The parents are “obligated to help one another as equal partners.” Families in the church complement each other to help make the family work together.

I believe that there should be gender roles, but that they won’t always be the same. Everyone has different circumstances like divorces, death, and tragic accidents.

I believe families should find gender roles that work for them and that they shouldn’t worry about what the world or other people think about them.